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earth day… April 22, 2009

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earth day!  yay!!! did a little bit of reducing, reusing and recycling.  you know, just like what jack johnson sings about!  he’s the bomb (like a really good/fun musician)!!! anyhoo, i hope you did a bit of earth day stuff.  let’s all save the planet and whatnot:)

myles, inspecting light bulbs

inspecting-light-bulbs

i think  i sord of did my small part today for the good of the earth.  let’s see, we minimized our electricity usage (reduce), gathered gently used clothes for giveaway (reuse), double-checked that all light bulbs were energy efficient(reduce), recycled the can i used for soup (recycle), minimized my water usage (reduce), and surprised myles with a fun little desert made of mud, bugs and worms.  he loved it!  of course it was actually made of chocolate pudding, gummy bugs and gummy worms. 

mmmmmmm, desert!    dirt-earth-worms-and-bugs

perhaps i will do a bit better next year for earth day.  but until then…i am going to conserve a bit more energy and go to sleep!

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no words… April 20, 2009

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having one of those overcast, dreary kind of days – probably because that’s exactly what it looks like outside.  though, i am pretty glad that it is no longer frigid.  it’s one of those days that you wish you could stay underneath the blanket reading a really good book, eating a bowl of popcorn.  this all sounds really good except i have a mess of papers calling my name. ugh

anyhoo,  as i move into a different chapter of my life, i’ve had to have some “it’s not good-bye but it’s see you around” kind of phone conversations.  a good number of the conversations have gone well and i have felt the support and friendship.  but then there are the conversations that left me exhausted and extremely frustrated.  those were the hard ones.  ugh

anyhoo, here i sit, tired of making phone calls, tired of researching online and just plain ol’ tired.  right now is when a nice little packet of peeps would do me good.  we all know how i like hanging with my peeps (you know, the total colored sugar covered marshmallow candy…yummmmm)!

i think i’ll turn in early tonight because by the end of this day, i will have no more words.  just a big deep sigh and a readiness to get on with things.  come what may. i’m ready. i think:)

their eyes are watching you… April 17, 2009

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as parents, we watch or at least we try to watch everything we say or do around our children.  if we’re honest, there are some slip ups and our kids are right there to call us on it or catch us in act.  so i guess you can say that having children really causes one to straighten up any behavior that you might otherwise try to get away with.  no more using the c word (by c word i’m talking about the word – crap), instead of saying that sucks you now probably say something that ‘s a non-potty mouth equivalent.   and when frustrated you really have to watch your actions and your words…you know what i mean.  they will handle things the same way you do, with the exception of some of their fits and tantrums which are completely natural (this too can be curbed or cured) teehee.

anyhoo, what i’m starting to realize is that some things that we are talented at are kind of in our dna.  but how we approach life is something that we pass on to our kids as well.  i’m really curious about what kind of person my little myles will be when he grows up.  it’s fun watching him and his personality shine and wonder what kind of man he will be and what kind of profession he will choose.  i’ve also discovered that it is really important to nurture what you see in your children and not take for granted that they’ll know what to do with their talents.  nuture what you see them leaning towards! 

lately, i’ve been checking out my little guy and boy has he learned a couple of things from me that i’m actually really proud of.  i didn’t teach him to do it but i was really surprised to see how apt he was at this certain talent.  the other day we were talking and he pretty much took a meeting with me.  if i didn’t give birth to him myself, i would not believe that he was just a five year old boy.  to say the least, he impressed me.  i later played conversation back in my mind and realized he had been watching what i do and he had picked up on how to do this “thing” and he is surprising detail oriented.  if i had to guess i now have an idea of some of the talents that God has blessed me with.  so cool!

i’m proud of him.  i know that i need to continue and work really hard to show him (by example) how to approach life. i choose to show him by my example to approach life with an open mind and with passion, respect for others, moral and standards that he will be proud of. 

 so yes, they are watching every move you make.  so whatever you do, do it well.  so whatever you say be appropriate and make sure your words are life giving and don’t tear down others.  and yes, i as well as most humans on the planet will have slip ups.  (sighing and cringing at the thought of some of my slip ups.  ugh!). anyhoo,  show your kids how to come back from those mistakes.

and this video is just for the heck of it and because i like 80s music.  you know that i couldn’t bring up this topic and not have this song popping into my head. smile

he put his hand where?… April 14, 2009

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yes, i have a boy.  yes, he is the best thing since warm, buttered dinner rolls or sugar or lip gloss or the color orange or a pair of really cute stilettos.  yes, he is loud, fun and rambunctious.  yes, he is sooooo much fun.  yes, he is wired soooo opposite of me because he is a boy.  yes, he is all mud, bug, worms and picking scabs.  and yes, he is already flirting with the ladies.  aaaaaahhhh.

but…

i was not fully aware of what was to come with certain boy happenings.  nothing new, but funny and surprising each time i see it.  if you have a boy and you’re a mommy and not a daddy (because daddy’s already know this stuff, i think) what to expect at certain times.  like for instance when little boys wake up and things are poking out at you.  it’s like whoa!  or like when they are sleeping or just watching t.v. and they are doing an al bundy, you know, sitting there with their hand down their pants…just chillin’. 

yep, one day their hugging stuffed animals and the next day they are doing stuff that as a mommy, you have to act unsurpised about.  i don’t want to shame him because i know that it is all natural boy stuff and innocent.  at least i think it is. 

as he was taking a nap today, i looked over at him and viola! there he was hands in pants and snoring like a banshee.  too funny.  i almost took a picture of him in that state but i think i have enough embarrassing pics like that.  this time i’ll cut him some slack.

peeing on trees, pt. 2… April 13, 2009

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myles comes home from school, puts away his jacket, shoes and such, figures out what he wants for lunch, comes up stairs, plops in the rocking chair and decides that, “from now on, this will be my rocking chair – okay momma?” as he rubs the arms of the chair he says, “this will be my rocking chair because i’m wise, can this be my rocking chair momma?”  sure, i say.  not really thinking that he meant it in a serious kind of way. 

a while later andre’ comes upstairs and sits in the chair, myles walks over to him and says, “this is my rocking chair because i’m wise, so can you please get up?”  andre’ (looks at him with a smirk and in disbelief that he would even say such a thing) “what do you mean myles?” of course myles responds, “seriously, this is my chair.”  andre’ looks at me.  i am not sure what to say because i surely did not think that he (myles) really assumed that the chair was his, for real. 

he has staked his claim, marked his territory and has given a reason as to why.  yep, he’s staking his claim (peeing on trees again).  my assumption is that this too shall pass and in a few days he won’t even remember that he claimed this piece of furniture.  i think that i have to make sure that he knows that the chair can and should be shared with the rest of us. 

i’ll think twice before answering the question as to whether or not he can “stake claim” to a piece of furniture that belongs to everyonein the house.  tooooooo funnnny!

emabracing the day… April 13, 2009

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easter / resurrection day was a unique and good day.  embracing all activity that today held, however, never far from my mind was the extreme gratefulness and awe of what the celebration of this day means.  memories of my childhood come to mind as i listen to my myles recite, memorize and understand  john 3:16 just as i did as a lttle kid. 

we started the day off with a prayer and myles decides that he needs to say the whole prayer.  short, sweet and to the point, was his prayer.  i think he assumed that if i or his dad prayed we would be there for a while. the most interesting thing is, i was pretty impressed by what he said.  but of course i’m a pretty proud momma anyway. 

it was great to see others embrace the day and its meaning/purpose by accepting Christ as their savior for the first time.  it was important for me to embrace the day for so many reasons.  throughout challenges of life, it’s quite possible to find joy and inner peace.  i thought about my little angel baby and how she is actually in heaven with Christ.  that was a wow moment.  as much as i would like to watch her run around down here on earth we me (dressed in her little pastel easter duds) –  to know that she is safe in his arms on this special day, man oh man, my creative imagination cannot even begin to touch how fantastic it must be where she is. 

as i sat in front of my angel baby’s head stone, her “resting place”, the field where her little body “rests”, i close my eyes and let my imagination take me there…my heart was full.  for that moment i didnt’ think about the emptiness of my arms, the emptiness of the fourth chair at our dining table, the emptiness of a second child size bed, the emptiness i feel from time to time because she is not with me…my heart was overwhelmingly full in that moment. 

the wind was blowing a crisp, cool, refreshing breeze.  the sun was slightly shining.  the grass was a soft cushion underneath me.  with my eyes closed, i allowed God to take me take me away, to transport me to another place.  wonder and awe is all i have to say. 

embracing the day for whatever it held.  my heart is full. 

      the-blue-balloon2     easter-pics-0171         easter-pics-016

God almighty and the easter egg hunt… April 12, 2009

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myles (five year old):  when we get home, we can have an egg hunt with all my friends?  we can talk about the Lord and everybody can get eggs. 

me:  that sounds like fun.  what are you going to tell them about the Lord?

myles:  i don’t know.  he started easter right?  i don’t know what else to tell him about the Lord, we can just talk.  you said we don’t just do eggs and all that.

me:  (explaining with more details, again.  also, surprised that he is unfazed by our family’s omission of the easter bunny and remembering how he walked right by groups of people waiting to take a picture with a “bunny ” and he kept walking as if a six foot five fluffy white stuffed animal was nothing to give a double take)

myles:  oh yeah, if they don’t want to hear about the Lord they can just go and sit in the sun and just play or something.

losing my religion while holding on to my peeps… April 10, 2009

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holy week is a good time for revival of our soul and relationship with God and to basically lose your religion.  so with that being said, i was just thinking about a few things as i was hanging out with my peeps…

being a candy addict, i certainly can appreciate all the yummy seasonal candies that arrive just in time for us to fill those easter baskets.  one of the fun parts to the weekend is raiding the easter basket of my myles. mmmmmmm, num yummy.  okay, it’s more like pillaging his easter basket when he is not looking. oh, i hang my head in shame with a peep hanging out of my mouth.  teehee. 

 my family and i engage in many different holy week and easter weekend festivities.  the thoughts and the rush of all the following will be happening in many different families, homes, churches, etc:  little girls and their adorable little easter dresses, little boys wrestling with their ties that match their easter suits.  there won’t be a shortage of easter hats, easter baskets, easter candy, easter shopping, big family easter dinners, easter sales, easter egg hunts, easter hair-dos, easter pageants, easter shoes, easter ham, easter cooking,  and so on and so forth.  by the way, what does ham have to do with easter?  i’ve always found that to be strange interesting.  anyhoo…

all of these things many of us have done or will do annually, without fail, sometimes with much angst…religiously.

for some people, holy week is a time to revive their relationship with Christ or maybe for the first time are reconciled to Christ.   we acknowledge, recognize, celebrate, remind ourselves and stand in awe of  what happened over two thousand years ago on our behalf. 

as my heart is stirred and i stand at a loss for words for the example Christ was for us.  even in the midst of extreme torture, what strikes me as one of the most profound moments of that night…”father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing” 

as i acknowledge what he did for me and how he did it – it’s enough to make me lose my religion.  by religion i certainly don’t mean to not go to church or to not believe in God.  as a person who believes in being passionate about life and whatever you put your hands to, i feel just the same about not being religious about how you do church, but getting passionate about living as Christ lived.

as we well know, to live as Christ lived was not out of ritual and there was much sacrifice involved.  and as you can tell by some of his last words, it was not easy to take it all…for us.

to celebrate this holy week and all the activities that go with it, remember to focus less on the rituals of the season and take your mind, heart and soul to a place of holy renewal, holy wonder, holy awe, holy belief.

i’ll never be able to wrap my head around the sacrifice and the passion of our Lord.  but i would much rather live as passionately as he did and lose my religion any day.  that certainly doesn’t mean that i will lose my belief in Him. 

can i kiss you… April 8, 2009

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he really is turning into such a good sport.  he, being my myles (my precious five year old).  am i surprised?  ummmm yeah.  i’ve seen some un- sportsman-like behavior come from him that really made me wonder. 

the other day i listened in on a play date that myles was having with a friend.   he did not know that i was listening and i witnessed by way of eavesdropping (don’t act like you don’t do it to your children) his little compassionate heart up-close.  (insert sentimental sigh)

myles and his little friend were reading books and he noticed his friend struggling to read a lot of the words in the book.  so he told her, “you don’t have to read all the words in the book, you can just make up your own words, it’s okay if you make them up.”   as soon as he said this to his friend, she was immediately at ease and started “reading” her own words without the shame of not knowing the real words. 

he never once told his friend how well he reads, he never teased his friend, nor did he question his friend about what they could or could not do.  (sentimental sigh) at the moment i could have just given him a big ‘ol momma bear hug for his thoughtfulness.

so here’s the kicker…he later asked his little friend if he could kiss her hand.  oh yeah, smooth move slick willy.  so all along, was he just sweetening her up to get a kiss?  i wanted to yell into the room – dude, slow down…you’re only five!

pearl and the trees… April 6, 2009

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 if you’re ever feeling like you can’t, think again.  i saw a show about a man who lives in the south and he has such an inspiring story.  it was obvious and not a doubt to all who walked in the presence of his garden that he was doing exactly what God put in him to do.  he didn’t have much money and a lot of his creations come from hand-me-down nursery stuff.  he gave no excuses.

after watching the show, there is no way that  one could not be inspired.  pearl used his hands to create the most fantastic garden.  did i say garden, pfff, i  meant to say…topiary magnificence.  he didn’t use a lot of chemicals and he didn’t even have an irrigation system.  he simply used what God gave him and was resourceful about how to make “it” happen.  he gave no excuses.

how many times do we let the excuses that others give us or the ex cues that we give ourselves stop us from jumping out there and pursuing what we are internally passionate about.  i’ve recently started to work on some things that i am soooooo excited about.  it encompasses a number of things that i’ve been saying that i’d like to do.  in passing, i’ve talked about it for years, but now the work begins. i’m. am. excited!

i had the research and planning in motion when i saw this show about pearl.  it (the show) certainly gave me more inspiration to let my sense of resourcefulness go wild. 

isn’t it interesting how you can look at someone else’s life and get a new perspective and find more find more inspiration to fuel your inspiration.  thanks pearl.

check out this quick excerpt of “a man named pearl“. this show was seen on hgtv so hopefully you can find it or catch it on tv.  in the meantime and in between time…get inspired.

shake down and a new perspective… April 3, 2009

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if you’ve ever experienced a shake down and your world did not quite turn out the way you planned…do you have a plan b?  these days it seems as if lots of folks are finding themselves in need of a plan b. 

 i remember when my myles started talking about his plan b, he was 3 years old at the time.  whenever he would be playing with toys or doing almost anything, he would make sure that if you came anywhere near him that you would know not to mess with his plan b.  i thought that what he was saying was really funny at the time and i didn’t think too seriously about how profound that was for a three year to even think in that way.  oh to be wise and young.  on second thought, was it just his males instincts, his creativity, the hunter, gatherer, hoarder, etc. in him.  either way, it did make me think a bit about looking beyond the now and just simply the norm.

usually when you lose it all, or lose that “great” job with a pretty healthy salary, lose that relationship that you think that your world would end without it, when you lose friendships, when you’re stuck in a dead end situation and don’t know what the heck to do next, when the plans that you set your sights on did not go quite as you desired and so on and so forth…what do you do next?

not all the time are we going to think ahead when we’re in the midst of our current blissful situation, however, anytime is an opportunity to start doing the thing you are really passionate about but didn’t do because of fear or otherwise.  big let downs can be your gateway into your new fulfilling life.  ooohhh, i think i just made up a new quote.  let me say it again, big let downs can be your gateway into your new fulfilling life.  it’s all about perspective…so get a new one (perspective that is or a new life, it kind of adds up to the same, don’t you think?).

a lot of times people will stay focused on their let down and then get stuck in a trap of not letting that mad energy fuel them into doing what they were created for.  every single one of us was created with a specific “special” thing about us and in crazy times or not-so-crazy times i say, GO FOR IT!!!

once you open up the space in your own head to do what is your internal healthy desire, you will realize a certain freedom in your life. 

so i say…take the bull by the horns, let go of your fear(s), dive in full throttle.  you just might be surprised at what you discover about yourself.  let no words from others or yourself halt your progress.  if you need a little help with that take a page and a few words from my now five year old myles…”don’t mess with my plan b”!